Saturday, August 9, 2008

Back to the starting block.

Thanks to everyone for their thoughts, prayers, and comments as we went in for our baseline testing. My FSH and estrogen levels were where they needed to be -- praise the Lord! Yesterday afternoon we got the word from the IVF coordinator to start BCPs today (day 3) . . . but then this morning she called and said that because of my low antral follicle count per the ultrasound, we wouldn't qualify for the shared-risk program if we went ahead with IVF this month and so the clinic recommended that we sit out this month and try next month. She surmised that the low count could be because I was on BCPs this past month, which the RE prescribed to ensure healing from my lap surgery back in June, and wants me to lay off of any hormones this coming month and come back in for more baselines when I start my September cycle.

I'll admit -- I shed a few tears. DH was wonderfully comforting, and then we proceeded on with our weekend. I think a big part of this process for me has been learning that this is not about my schedule, and I've got to learn that this is in God's hands, not mine, DH's, or even the RE's. The good news is, I can now go ahead and finalize plans for a fabulous girls' weekend in Boston over Labor Day and not worry about having to pack Lupron shots in my carry-on! It will also be good to have a bit of a break and spend time thinking about other folks for a change. I'm afraid that this process has encouraged me to indulge in my propensity for navel-gazing, and this extra month is a good time to channel that energy away from myself and towards others.

We hope and pray that this happens for us, and trust in His timing, not ours. Thanks for your encouragement and continued support!

9 comments:

Courtney said...

I'm so sorry. I can't imagine how hard it was to get this news. Enjoy your break, and we will just look forward to September.

sarah said...

I am so sorry to hear you are canceled. I can (REALLY) relate! Different reasons, but same phone call. You are right, we can't make this happen on our time, so there is no reason to get worked up. Enjoy your hormone free month and it looks like we will be on the exact same time table once again!

Just Me. said...

I am so sorry.

Thinking of you.

(((hugs))))

andrea_jennine said...

I'm sorry for the disappointing news. However, I can say from experience that even un-wanted breaks can be really restful and peaceful. Praying that's the case for you.

I Believe in Miracles said...

I'm so so sorry!! I cannot even imagine how you're feeling right now - especially given the previous post. I hope you can enjoy the month off and just relax, rest and normalize so everything will be find for Sept.
**BIG HUGS**

Alex and Jill said...

I'm sorry it didn't work out this time around, girl.

Enjoy that vaca in Boston...you deserve it!

Always praying...

*HUGS*

Leslie Laine said...

Hi Faith - thanks for your message! It was great to hear from you. I've been following along with your story and was able to ask some more informed questions of my IVF clinic yesterday because of your blog, so thanks. We are in the process of all the pre-testing this month - clomid challenge, etc. with plans to start IVF next cycle. I'll be following along, and I'll let you know how things are going. Looks like we'll be going through this thing together! :)

Rachie Pachie said...

Oh, wow... I'm so sorry to hear that. I can somewhat relate to wondering when the time is right, but with our December goal I know how devastated I'd be to find out it's delayed for another month.

Thinking about ya & saying a prayer for you. It's really rough to comprehend that *maybe* one day we will leave the pain of infertility, if even for a bit.

I hope you can relax a bit (HAHA, right?) & look forward to that weekend in September. It's only a couple weeks now... has this summer flown by or what!?

rescogitatae said...

Hi. I can't remember whether I came over to say hello when you commented on my blog. I can't imagine what it would be like to hear that your first real chance would come with an IVF cycle... and then to have that cycle cancelled. You must be unbelievably frustrated right now.

I hope you can enjoy your hormone free month. Best of luck with the fresh start in September.